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photo no. 17 - pout

I just got back from the dentist.  I have now had the second side of my mouth numbed and scraped below the gum line to treat my now recurring periodontal disease.  After the first treatment, almost two years ago, it wasn't supposed to come back.  But it did.  Possibly because I don't floss often enough, possibly because my nine year old sonicare died.  Possibly because my husband doesn't always brush his teeth before kissing me good night.  (yes, it makes me think, ew.)  This time, in order to truly kick it, I have had a dna test to see what kind of bacteria occurs in my mouth either just from food and environmental things, or from genetic precursors.  And now I have had the right and left side of my gums and teeth poked, prodded and scrapped by a kind woman that handed me a hot towel after attacking my face.  And now I am pouting uncontrollably.  Mainly because I feel as if I am going to chew the inside of my cheek out and that would be irritating once the feeling fully comes back into my mouth, assuming it ever does.

I also have been handed two different prescription antibiotics in order to kill the creepy genetic bacteria.  Well, it's killing a lot of other bacteria too.  So I'm numb in the face and itchy in the crotch all because I don't floss enough.  Let this be a lesson to you!

At least this took some of the attention off of the ultra itchy mosquito bites that I have from going to a glorious wedding this weekend, where my husband officiated.  Ordained by the Universal Life Church as a self-proclaimed Universal Philosopher of Absolute Reality, he has now married two sets of friends.  And it was lovely.  Of course I don't have many pictures because we both left our cameras in the hotel and my iphone was almost dead when I started trying to take pictures with that.  I did dance so hard in a pair of platform heels that my legs still hurt from all the work to my quads - gettin' down.  At one point I got down and couldn't get my ass back up and needed a hand.  And then I kept on dancing.  Here is a picture of the dress that I wore, the first strapless dress I've ever owned.  And it stayed up the whole night!   (Although I'm certain it's because I've gained too much belly weight to let it fall below a certain point - a plus side to my weight gain?)  Anyway, I looked pretty hot and I wish I had a picture of it.  Oh well.

Cirque A-line dress from Anthropologie with my own obi belt


I am definitely still stuck in a state of I don't have anything to say so I'm not going to post anything.  Actually, my head is, in fact, often wild with endless, useless words building up in my head that I never share.  Not even on twitter, because I also have a problem with the limitations of 140 characters, if only because I feel they have to be some sort of poetry.  This is such a cop out.  What I actually need to do is write and write and write and write and write.  If you don't like what I have to say, I'm sure you'll tell me.  In fact you did.  You told me to keep writing and I didn't.  I thought about it a lot, but I still didn't do it.  And then I went to the dentist, and came home feeling sorry for myself and started reading stuff that made me want to write stuff even if it wasn't very interesting.  I wish I had more time to read to be inspired to write, but then sometimes I think I might just piss it away doing laundry and feeling sorry for myself.  pout.

Comments

  1. I cannot express this better than the article you linked to (thanks for that) but I suppose it comes down to why you want to write...

    Do you write to create a forum to put forth a brand new idea or a better version of what else is out there? That's a goal that can rarely be met, even by full-time bloggers/writers.

    Do you want to write something better than anyone has ever written or even to write the very best version of what you have in you? Well, that's a rather unreachable goal as well and becomes more of a mechanism for beating up on onesself.

    Does your writing serve as a more-public-than-not journal that is helpful for your own journey as a person and writer and may also resonate with others? Perhaps/probably. (And my apologies for using the term "journey", it's starting to bug me big time.)

    Does actively writing...capturing words on paper or the digital equivalent...make a writer a better writer? Yup.

    If you're a writer...you write.

    Don't worry about about writing for your audience. Write for yourself...your audience will find you.

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  2. I'm a sucker for happy endings. C'mon...just one more post. You don't want to go out with an eternal blog pout.

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