All right. I'll be honest. Many times when I make promises to myself, I berate myself until I can't keep my own promises. I made a promise to keep writing this blog. I want to write this blog. I enjoy writing this blog. And I love the unexpected connections I've made with some of you (although with my vacancy, I have lost touch as well). But here, I have sometimes had to falsify my feelings in order to keep this blog positive and optimistic - something I thought was important. So, when I was on the brink and simply could not be positive or optimistic, I had nothing. Or, very little to say. No one likes a debbie-downer, right. I felt as if I would be a disappointment to myself and to you if I spilled my icky self-deprecating guts all over this blog. But frankly, I'm just not all sunshiny and blossomy like that. I'm a real girl, with real feelings and when I have reached out here, you all have only given me kindness. Having left this blog alone for so long, I have become a disappointment to me. So, having said that, I'm back, ready to be honest (if moody), and I really want to keep in touch this time.
That last post way back in October was a subtle announcement that I finally, after many long painful days, over two and a half years in fact, I got a new job. But I didn't want to jinx it and I felt very uncertain. It was a hard transition. While many people slack off on those last two weeks of a job, I worked harder than ever because I didn't want to be a disappointment. To who, I'm not sure, but maybe me. A last hoorah of hard work to prove I did something good. Then I worked really hard to try to learn this new job and got a little bit burnt out sitting in front of a computer screen. And then I hurt my back. And then it was winter and the chaos of xmas, and then it was really winter. And then, and then something big happened. Something I wasn't sure I could ever do.
With a lot of love and support, my husband and I bought a house! Isn't it lovely! Here's the first picture I'm going to share with you to really drive up the excitement:
|our official half bath. don't you just love that purple privacy curtain?|
I am really proud of the hard work my husband and I have done on this house so far, even though we have a long way to go. And I really want to share some of our chaos with you. So that is my new plan. What started as a wedding blog, and became and I-don't-know-what blog, is becoming a renovating nightmare blog. I think it all still fits with my silly title of broken*saucer. So, what do you think?